March 29, 1918 - January 1, 2009

I'm glad you're not in pain anymore. You'll be missed, you are loved.

This year I am thankful for...

God, Julie, Teddy (see video below), Lola (see video below), mom, dad, dar, friends and family, URrelay, Avengers comic books, hot chocolate, vanilla ice cream, old commercials that are better than regular shows of today, coffee, Dan Aykroyd, John Candy, being barefoot, White Rain hairspray, museums, fans (even the annoying ones), hecklers ("fans don't boo nobodies" - Reggie Jackson), the end of the W. administration, Johnny Cash, zombies, suede, etc., etc., etc...

This is me with my dogs, yesterday:

Hi,

Internets is back up and running and the fun times are beginning.

And I'm learning a thing or two about copyright laws and how easy it is to upset people. The other day I tried posting a video on You Tube that used Tommy Roe's "Dizzy" in it. You Tube didn't allow it to be posted. And now I have a video that seems to have gotten the attention of the Village People (actually that of someone on You Tube claiming to represent them) over one little snippet of "YMCA". Oh no! I suppose they'll be sending the cop after me now. Maybe he'll bring the Indian chief and the biker with him.

I suppose I should take all this a little more seriously, but come on! It's the Village People! Maybe they're mad because the video is called "Crap from the 70s". *shrug*

As a writer I do understand the need for copyright laws and so on, but... BUT... I guess my views are a bit more liberal than others. If someone were to take one of my copyrighted stories and put their name on it and try to pass it off as theirs, that would irritate me. If they were only using a portion of the story and were giving me credit, I'm fine with that. It's not as if I'm trying to pass these songs off as my own. The video with Tommy Roe in it was called "Tommy Roe - Dizzy".

I think the reason I am so annoyed by the Tommy Roe thing is that I do believe he's one of those artists that has to make new recordings of his songs when someone wants to put them in a compilation because whoever actually owns the song won't release it. It's really sad when the actual artist has so little say about their own work.

I guess I've always believed that it should be okay to take a bit of music, a photo, whatever and if you rework it into something else, incorporate other things with it and change it, then it becomes a new work of art and it should be okay to be used. I will admit a bit of hypocracy here: it still burns me that Vanilla Ice used a bit of a Queen / David Bowie song without permission, but that's because a) he lied and pretended he didn't and b) Vanilla Ice is lame.

Oh, and one of my older videos contains a John Lee Hooker song. I was contacted over that and the publishing company that owns the song told me I could use the song if they could have all the money made off the video. I agreed to that, since I'm not making any money from the videos, anyway. But, yeah, I think that's pretty cool.

Well, anyway. Now I'm back but if I suddenly go away again for a long time you'll know that the Village People came along and beat me up for making fun of them. Stupid Village People.

I still haven't connected to the Internet at home. My latest paycheck was a bit lighter than usual (due to one day of unpaid vacation and one day of unpaid sick leave) so I am waiting until next pay day.

Meanwhile, I've started writing up some stuff for MAD. I'm not sure that I like it, but that's okay. I'm getting something down, at least.

Vacation was nice. I was a bit bored the first few days... home alone with nothing much to do. I actually started missing work. Then I went with Julie to Des Moines for a couple days. We saw her uncle and aunt, my grandma, parents, aunt and brother. We spent a little time at Living History Farms and some time at the zoo. It was a pretty good time.

And Marvin is back and as good as new. I sent off a letter to Computer Heaven, not out and out calling them scam artists or crooks, but telling them I have no faith in their capibilities. Er... I'm pretty sure I told you guys about my problems with them. If not, I'll be sure to do that soon.

I'm off work a bit early and am waiting for my bus so I thought I'd do a quick entry here.

I have been looking into magazines that will publish works of fiction to see what I think would work for me. I found out something interesting. MAD magazine is 100% freelance written. I didnt' know that. I thought they had a staff of writers and artists and didn't take any freelance work. People, especially my friend Mom, have told me that my writing is similar to something in MAD magazine, especially those silly Survivor things I do.

I have ideas all the time that would work in MAD. I am going to contact them and see what their guidelines are. The book I found the information in basically said, "anything funny" and went on to say, "anything that makes us pee our pants laughing" or something like that.

I'm not sure if I can be that funny, but we'll see.

I'm sure I'll never be as funny as Don Martin. No one could be that funny.

But, get this. A lot of magazines pay around five to fifty dollars a story. MAD pays five hundred dollars A PAGE! That's, like, real money! It would definitely be worth a shot.

Okay. I'm going to be on vacation for a couple of weeks, but hopefully I'll have my computer back in a few days. When I get it back I'm going to call and hook up to Internet. NOT through Mediacom again. I'm sick of them.

A couple of big things I don't think I've mentioned in posts recently:

Marvin is with my brother now. In fact, he's fixed. I am hoping to get over that way very soon to pick him up. It was the hard drive, just like I told Computer Heaven.

During this long hiatus without a computer, I've been indulging my creative side by hand writing stories just for me. Basically I'm redoing the very original stories I wrote about my superheroes. It's been fun working with them again and I think the stories is much better this time around.

Hope everyone had a happy Labor Day!

I spent the day, what else, laboring. I cleaned the house and then came to work.

I have such a thrilling life.

I'm off work early and NTS isn't here, yet, so here's a couple more fun stories from the bus.

The other day this chunky elderly fellow got on. He had his bus pass hanging from a cord thing around his neck. The pass is white with a green arrow on it. The arrow was pointing downward from his stomach. The pass has his name on it. His name is Seemen. I want to ask him if it's helping him to advertise.

There's a younger guy that rides the bus sometimes. He has been in prison and now he's a telemarketer. He looks exactly like Barack Obama. I don't know why, I just think it's kinda funny.

Some days I have to wonder... why did I get up today?

It's not that it's been a horrible day, but a day of lots of annoyances. Sometimes annoying days are worse than, oh, say days where you set your house on fire and break all your bones.

Today:

I locked the basement key in the basement. It's the only one we have. (Yes, bolt cutters and a new padlock will solve the problem, but still...)

NTS (nighttime bus thingy that takes me home) has my schedule all mixed up. Somehow they have it down that they're supposed to pick me up at home on Saturday night at 8:45 instead of at work at 9:15. I hope they get it straightened out. Cab rides from here are expensive. When I called Brenda back to complain about her changing the schedule like that she responded by saying (get this) "but I can't fix it. It's been printed!" I'm sorry, but I fail to see how having to reprint a document that she messed up is my problem.

Anyway.

I almost witnessed a fight on the bus between a drunk old black man and a young black woman. I don't know what was said, I just heard the drunk man shouting, "you fucking peckerhead!" over and over at her until the bus driver stopped the bus and asked if there was a problem.

"Naw, he's just an old foolish man."

"Old man! Why I'm seventy years old!" And the bickering started up again. I don't know why they didn't get thrown off.

Darwyn has me trying to track my computer, but there is no tracking number on the receipt. I'm not sure if this means it didn't show up at his place or if he's too lazy to go to the office and see. (I'm guessing the latter). I suppose this means I'll be making calls all weekend trying to figure out where it is, only so I can tell him, "it's at the office."

And I just heard there's a mouse in the building. Wait, I saw it last night and I'm not afraid of mice so that's not a bad thing. We have bats here, too.

Okay, then! Time to start working!

Marvin is gone to West Des Moines where my brother is going to do some work on him. I shipped him Fed Ex today. Hope he comes back soon and ready to work, finally!

Not much time to do this, but I thought I'd do a few mini reviews of some of the movies I've seen this summer...

THE INCREDIBLE HULK: William Hurt seemed out of place in an otherwise tight and interesting Hulk movie. Much better than the one from a few years ago. ****1/2

THE X-FILES "I WANT TO BELIEVE": Sorry, Craig, but I really liked it. Sleepy and a bit slow, but an interesting story. ***1/2

IRON MAN: Didn't think I would like it. Boy was I wrong. *****

THE DARK KNIGHT: Doesn't quite reach the hype. Nicholson is still the ultimate Joker, but Heath Ledger did a good job. Michael Caine is, however, the best Alfred of all time. ****

GET SMART: Almost as good as the show. Almost. ****

INDIANA JONES AND THE KINGDOM OF THE CRYSTAL SKULL: A little different from the others in the series, but worthy to be included (despite what a lot of people say). ****

Today is the last Saturday that Lisa will be working with me. I'm kinda sad. I have known about her long before I started working here. She's a published writer that Julie befriended some time ago and they used to talk about me and my writing. Now I have gotten to know her and I really like her. We bonded a bit over her "man troubles". I think she's finally done with that asshole Lester. Anyway, she'll still be around, but not on Saturday, the one day I usually sit with her and gab away the afternoon. Ah, well. I keep thinking I should invite her to go to the movies with Julie and me or something, but Lisa says her kids are monsters. Not sure if I want to have monsters sitting in a dark theater with me.

The bus continues to be hell on wheels. Smelly, hot, smelly, cramped, smelly. I have come to loathe the Queen of Route 5, a bellowing foghorn disguised as an ugly woman who demands that she is first on the bus no matter when she actually got in line so she can take up two seats (one for each cheek). I will stand if I see an elderly person that needs a seat. Will the Queen? Oh, no. She mustn't! I should respect her, I suppose. She is older than me... by about two years.

I have come to avoid riding route 10 when another woman, Michelle, is on it. Michelle gets off work from Goodwill around 2:00, so I have started taking the 1:00 bus. I get over to this side of town quite early but that's okay. I fill my bladder at Barnes and Noble with lots of black iced tea and mush my brain with comic books until it's time to come to work. Michelle loves to sit by me. I do not know why, but I have my suspicions. She will sit next to me, then shout and wave at everyone else on the bus. I think she wants everyone to think we're together. No matter where I am on the bus, she will get as close as she possibly can. One day she kept touching, touching, touching me and finally noticed that I was visibly cringing and wrapping myself into a ball the best I could (no joke). "Oh, you don't like to be touched, right?"

"No. Not really."

"Why? We're friends! You're my really good friend, Greg!"

She thinks my name is Greg on some days. Other days I'm Dan.

And what can I do? The bus drivers are all on edge these days. Everyone bitches about the lack of air conditioning, how crowded it is, that the bus is late... what could I say? "Pardon me, but there is this weird girl that keeps sitting by me and touching me". Yeah, that'll send them over the edge into pure road rage.

So, I go to Barnes and Noble on days I don't want to deal with Michelle.

She attends the church where Julie used to work, so Julie knows her. Julie says Michelle has, well, issues and I'm right to be cautious with her.

And that filled up my lunch break.

Later.

So, when I got to work today I saw an article on Yahoo saying someone has proof that Bigfoot exists. I haven't read the article yet, but I am full of doubt. I did watch a video of a chupacabra. Looks very much like a pit bull. Hmm...

My friends, I broke a record recently and I'm not very proud of it. I had to recertify with the company, proving I can still type fast enough to work here. I generally type around 75 to 90 words a minute but when I took the test I was down around 55 or so. You have to hit 60 to pass. So, I retook the test, retook the test, retook the test... no one has taken it as many times as I now. I am not sure how many times I took it, but if someone said it was 80 I would not be surprised. I love my job and I was so afraid I wasn't going to pass and I might end up in telemarketing again that I froze whenever I sat down to do the test. About a week ago I walked in and passed with a 63. It felt so easy that day. So, I am now wearing a bright orange t-shirt with URrelay.com across the chest. This is the gift that the company gives to employees when they have officially passed the test and their first year is over. Um... you might be wondering if you are so inclined to keep detailed notes about my entire life why my first year took 14 months to complete. The flood had a lot to do with it. With all the trouble of relocating and all that crap they didn't have the typing tests set up until about a month ago.

Several people here in management did all kinds of things to assist me in passing the test. I was told by one that if anyone was going to try to fire me for not passing and they weren't going to give me a chance, she would fight for me. I really feel blessed to work here and to have management that is going to fight to keep me here. (The FCC calls a lot of the shots when it comes to the requirements to work here).

Gotta get back to work. More later.

Just thought I'd point that out since AGAIN I haven't posted in weeks. My computer is now a placemat. Maybe a door stop. I think the hard drive is gone. I'm going to try go get a new one fairly soon. A hard drive that is... although I am shopping for a second computer so this kind of stuff doesn't keep happening... I HATE not having the Internet at home! At least we now have the Internet at work again so I can stop in and tell you lovelies what is going on and why I haven't been posting.

And so much is going on! First and foremost, I now have a copy of "Manos: Hands of Fate" on DVD. Alas, it is without a couple of babbling robots and a guy in a jumpsuit, but at least now Julie has experenced the awesome terror and the flurry of moths that is "Manos: Hands of Fate". And I'm super bummed about not having Internet at home because I have a very fun idea for a show starring Torgo for my videos on You Tube. Hopefully very soon.

Meanwhile, Julie and I have been going to the Unity Center a bit lately. I don't quite agree with everything they believe, but their beliefs come closer to mine than any church I've ever encountered.

Kyle and Aradia are still living with us. So are, of course, Teddy and Lola. And Peeper.

And Cedar Rapids continues to clean up and rebuild. It's amazing the way a disaster can bring out the jerkiness in people. I stood in line to get on my bus (which is free right now) in front of some guy that I SWEAR looks like the real live Homer Simpson. And all Homer could do is bitch about having to stand in the sun and wait to get on the bus and how the drivers should let us on so we could sit in the bus and wait. Big jerk.

Anyhoo... about time to start working. Just want to say I miss you all, love you all and will TRY to take a gander through your journals this evening.

Look. I'm only going to write this once so pay attention. I suppose you could read it as many times as you want.

Aradia's computer decided to go kaput, so I haven't updated for a while. AGAIN!

I have my computer back, but it's still not 100% right. It works really well sometimes, like now, but other times it really lags. I keep messing with it and it seems to be getting better. I'm running low on Silly Putty and Band Aids, though, so hopefully it will start functioning correctly soon.

Julie was in two car accidents this week. Yep, two. Fortunately, she wasn't severely hurt either time, but she's in some pain. Kyle was driving her in his car the second time. Julie's worried they're going to total her car.

Otherwise, things are tense and frustrating all over town. Cleanup continues downtown and probably will for months.

Work has moved to another location. School was starting at Mount Mercy for summer classes so we moved to a strip mall near Lindale Mall in a space that used to house a mattress store. We'll be there for a while, at least until it's determined if we can move back to the old location. I really hope we end up back downtown somewhere. It's a lot closer to home.

Kyle and Aradia had to evacuate their home and they're staying with us for a little bit. Aradia brought her lap top along, so I'm using it to do a quick update.

Downtown is flooded now. Water is several feet high in some places judging by pictures and video I've seen. URrelay is underwater, but they have relocated to Mt. Mercy college. Then they closed. Then they opened. They called to tell me that if I didn't feel like I could make it in not to bother. I called back and said that it took Julie three hours to drive across town earlier today and so I don't think I'll be in. Mt. Mercy is way over on the other side of town from here.

I walked as far toward downtown as I could get earlier. It's creepy to see places I go by nearly every day now sitting in what looks like a lake. Creepy and sad. TV is nothing but "news" about the floods... basically repeating things over and over and not really saying anything new. I can't stand it. Some blonde chick on there keeps comparing this to Katrina or "the movie Titanic" and keeps talking about her tragic day, like having to dress in the dark (but I hope I look okay) and the extra twenty minutes it took for her to get to work. Naughty bit of language coming: I figure the only reasons she is behind the news desk is because she is pretty and sucks a lot of cock. I am not making this up. She actually asked one reporter, "now, is the flood water, like, clear or is it kind of muddy?" Where did they find her and why can't they send her back to that street corner?

Going down to the flooded area is eerie. Fire trucks, cop cars and military vehicles everywhere. All the power is out. People are walking around in a daze with beer and cameras... I really wish I had a camera right now.

Some good news though, even though it makes Julie and me feel pretty stupid. The computer guy seems to think the problem with my computer is that it doesn't have enough memory. So, I'm adding a couple of gigs. I don't know why we didn't think of that! Duh!

Hi all,

Sorry for the silence, but there's been some issues going on. I'm writing from the church where Julie works, so I have to be brief so she can have her computer back.

Marvin is either very sick or dead. Not sure which. We're taking him to a place called Computer Heaven today to see if they can bring him back. Not sure if he has a virus, a bad fan or what. Julie worked with him as much as she could but I can't even turn him on anymore. Sigh. But, I think I can buy a new computer pretty soon if this one can't be fixed.

I was going to go to the library today or tomorrow to go into more detail about what's going on but... well... not sure if any of you have heard this from wherever you live, but Cedar Rapids is about to be underwater. Not all of it, of course, but the library is right in the area they're expecting to be flooded in a day or two. So, yeah, I might not be around much for a while. What else is new right?

My work place is very, very near the edge of the area that will be flooded, so I'm not real sure what's going on with that. Julie called last night to see what they are doing and I think they're going to relocate temporarily.

Our house is going to be okay, I'm sure. Part of our backyard might flood, but I doubt it will reach the house. We live sort of on the side of a hill.

I hope everyone is okay. I think about each of you every day and one of these days I really will be back around on a regular basis. Maybe a couple more weeks at the most.

Take care and love to all,
Puck

I used to read TV Guide back when I cared about TV*. So, totally ripping them off:

Cheers Nice customers. A user of our service complimented me BIG TIME to Zach the other day. I can't give a direct quote, but it was very flattering. Zach passed it on to Brian and I overheard him talking about it with Noelle. Nice to know the management is talking about me... in a good way. Zach told me he's nominating me for All Star.

Jeers You Tube. My latest video "21" looks like crap on there. I keep trying to figure out a way to fix it, but nothing is working. It makes me so sad as this is my favorite video to date. It's my baby and I love it, but it looks positively awful on You Tube.

Cheers Aradia. She came by last night to do Julie's nails while I was at work. She told Julie that the day I said she's like a daughter to me she nearly cried. Aww... I'm glad. I had been hoping that comment wasn't stepping over some boundries or something.

Jeers Our basement. The hose connected to the washer leaks. I was trying to figure out how to fix it and was bitten by a few spiders. Gah.

Cheers ASL class. I can tell the story of "Goldilocks and the Three Bears" in sign language! I will be doing that in class tomorrow. Tomorrow is the last class and I feel like I have learned a lot in eight weeks! Looking forward to ASL 2 this summer.

Jeers Mediacom. I've never had such poopy service in an Internet company. There's no reason it should be down so much. When I call to complain they say they're going to send a guy out and it'll cost me. Or I can buy their insurance. Yeah. Maybe I'll just shop around for a better service.

Cheers Income tax. I finally did them on the 14th and I will be getting a refund for the first time ever.

Jeers Clothes on dogs. Poor Teddy. Poor Lola.

*Okay, so I still watch "Survivor" and "Supernanny" and Julie is getting me into "The Vicor of Dibley". I don't like TV in general, okay?

Current Stats
* Current Favorite Song: "Camel Walk" - Southern Culture on the Skids

* Current Most Hated Song: "Raining McCain" - The McCain Girls (if you haven't heard it and want to subject yourself to horrible torture, look it up on You Tube)

* Current Obsessions: ASL

* Currently Reading: "A Basic Course in American Sign Language"

* Best Movie Seen This Week: I saw some bits of "Whale Rider". It looks pretty good.

* Best Moments of the Week: Going to the museum with Julie

* Worst Moment of the Week: Friday night I was in a terrible mood and extremely tired

* Best Thing I Cooked This Week: Treet and egg sandwiches (Treet is kind of like Spam)

* Something I Learned This Week: Learning more about how Nigerian scams work

* Pet Peeve of the Week: People at work that whine too much

Current Stats
* Current Favorite Song: "That Is Rock And Roll" - The Coasters / "Fire" - Pat Metheny

* Current Most Hated Song: Whichever wimpy Foreigner song made me change the radio channel yesterday

* Current Obsessions: Nothing really... still in my virtual ADD state

* Currently Reading: "A Basic Course in American Sign Language"

* Best Movie Seen This Week: "Hotel Rwanda"

* Best Moments of the Week: Finishing "The 1980s in Ten Minutes"

* Worst Moment of the Week: A couple times this week Teddy had some trouble breathing or something and it was pretty scary

* Best Thing I Cooked This Week: Bratwurst and fried cabbage

* Something I Learned This Week: Where the NTS office is

* Pet Peeve of the Week: The tired and cliched phrase: "Get a life"

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